In Memorium

Happy Father's Day

Date Report Number 327 aka Don's Party (at Frankie's place) - Part 1

Soooo.....yep. Had a date. First one for about 6 months...probably more.

I hadn't planned to date again. Not for a few months anyway, but I accidentally got chatting to a guy on OasisActive.com about 3 weeks ago, when my sister was here. I just wanted to think about something other than my cousins death I guess.

He was nice. A short, but to the point profile. Funny 'interests' and he seemed genuine. He also rode a Triumph ...let's call him 'Triumph Boy'. It turned out we'd actually gone to school together but just didn't know each other. We knew many of the same people though. Triumph Boy and I chatted every second day for a couple of weeks and then I suddenly had a free weekend night, which also happened to also be - Election Night.

I casually mentioned that my free weekend was approaching (not my usual free one but a BONUS free one thanks to my ex-husband splitting up with Skankorama again and playing 'devoted dad' to keep himself busy).

The following day (Friday), Triumph Boy wasn't online but I left a message which included my mobile number.

Ok...this isn't rocket science..right? It's Dating 101.....Remedial Dating in fact. Girl tells boy she is free this weekend...then gives boy phone number - easy peasy I would have thought. But what do I get? A measly 'hope you have a nice day' text message...ummmm?

Another couple of random texts on Friday and then again Saturday morning, to advise me he had just voted. Ok...yes...you voted, I fucking voted and now it's time to ask me out!!!

But....NOTHING.

So, it's 5pm and I'd resigned myself to the fact that I would be spending Election Night alone, glued to the TV, screaming at the Australian voter all night as I watched the numbers tick over. It was at this point that I decided that alcohol would probably ease the pain of Mr Rabbit kicking Joolia's arse so I broke out the Black Sambuca and a shooter glass.

Two shooters later and I'm feelin' gooooood. "Hmmmph..now what the fuck is Triumph Boy doing tonight?"

Surely he couldn't be sitting on the computer waiting for me to come online and chat? He has my phone number for FUCK's sake. I logged on....and there he is... *sigh*.

Triumph Boy says:

hic,,,,fark!!!

Frankie says:

is it sad that I like watching the election coverage?

Triumph Boy says:

yes

Frankie says:

hmph

Triumph Boy says:

you bloody nerd....

Frankie says:

well. It's my first quiet weekend in WEEEKS. Thoroughly enjoying the downtime.

Triumph Boy says:

good for you....

Frankie says:

and my sambuca

Triumph Boy says:

no invite for me....oh well

Frankie says:

huh! you had my number!

Frankie says:

not my fault you wasted it!!

Triumph Boy says:

still got it

Triumph Boy says:

huh....?....but,,,,but,,,,

Triumph Boy says:

you never said nothin.....

Frankie says:

you're a dufus

Triumph Boy says:

yep....

Frankie says:

geez...i'm getting another sambuca

Triumph Boy says:

ans ya phone....

So.....he called. Hoorah! "You never said nothing"...? Seriously? Anyway, I STILL had to ask him over via the telephone as he just couldn't seem to figure it the fuck out. Jeeeezuz!

It was at that point that I started having doubts about Triumph Boy but it was too late, he was on his way. I hadn't shaved my legs in about 3 months so I didn't really have time to think about whether we were going to get married or not I just needed to find my goddam razor and get into some serious deforestation.

Now I should point out at this stage that I decided recently that I would pick potential partners as much as possible on personality, rather than looks. Although, when internet dating, there's not a lot to go on and I did think Triumph Boy was quite cute. I had also decided, prior to his arrival that there would be NO sex on the first date (no, seriously!).

However I must say I was a little disappointed when he rocked up. He'd gone from hip, cool and rugged looking guy with a bike and a mop of black hair in his profile photo, to Mr Bloody Average with a crew cut, knitted jumper and family vehicle (not that there's anything wrong with that..just was quite different to the 'display model' I had been admiring for the past 3 weeks).

Regardless of this sudden change of persona, he was still the same funny, laid back guy I'd been chatting to online. It was a fun night.

We sat at the corner of our separate sofas and chatted away, for a few hours, randomly screaming at the TV...all very civilised. At one point however he did sniff my neck....which I liked. Not long after that I seem to remember leaning over and laying a big kiss on him. It was ok. He's a bit of a slobberer. And then I fell down.

I decided that I'd had enough to drink. He'd also had enough and I invited him to sleepover on the couch..which he did. A few hours later he woke me up to say he was leaving..this was about 3am. He wanted to make sure I was ok with that. I was more than ok. I felt like utter crap and really didn't feel like having anyone witness my disgusting hangover in the daylight so was happy to wave goodbye and crawl back into my hole.

And that is the end of Part 1.

I will attempt Part 2 tomorrow but I'll tell you now..it doesn't end well.

Chance of Random Internet Dating Foray this week...?

R.I.P.

On Thursday 29th July at 1.30am my beautiful cousin Peter died. He was also my god son. He was 33 years old, had just built a beautiful new home with his fiance, bought a new puppy and was expecting his first child on Valentine's Day next year.

Many of you will already know this via Facebook but I had to write it here. My sister didn't think I should blog about it, but I need to. I've been putting it off but if I don't do it now, I simply can't blog about anything else. It would all be a lie if I didn't include his death, as part of my life.

So he died. It was unexpected, senseless and a waste of a beautiful soul. Our family will be broken without him. His mum and my mum are sisters. We are all very close. It's been hard.

The funeral was the Friday a week after his death (about 300 people attended), and this morning my aunt, his fiance, his brother and my sister, scattered his ashes in the river at a memorial park near where his mother lives.

There's so much I can say about Peter, so many things that make it all the more tragic but, it doesn't matter, because...he's gone.

RIP Beautiful Boy.

EDIT - oh and his favourite colour was purple....

Fly By Post

Wow, can't believe it's been so long since I posted. So..just a quickie to let you know how things are going.

I'm flat out! New job is going well. Still getting to know everyone and everything but I'm sure I'll get the hang of it soon enough. Everyone is really lovely so I'm very happy (and loving my new pay cheque!).

I'm feeling quite relaxed and stress free. Already have enough money put aside (after only two pays) for any major car repairs that may come up. Now to save towards moving house....but don't think we will have to move as it's supposed to be a 'long term' investment property. Would still like to have the money there just in case though.

I've only just settled into a routine as such this week as the first couple of weeks of my new job were during the school holidays so I took a couple of days off here and there to be at home with the kids. This is my first full week of work and I am knackered!

I know I'll get used to it soon enough. Getting much more organised and preparing everything the night before, so am able to get out of the door relatively early so that I'm home not long after the kids are.

My health and fitness have taken a back seat during the transition period. Didn't go totally off track though. I ordered Lite N Easy for the first two weeks (so I wouldn't fall into bad habits and buy take-away) and that kept me on the straight and narrow.

Watch out summer!

Birthday Gift

Well 'happy week' sure lived up to it's name :o)

For those of you that don't know already via Facebook - I GOT THE JOB!!!!!!!

The Dean's PA called me yesterday to find out if I was still interested in the position (ummm...yeah!). They had managed to get in contact with the other members of the selection panel (who were on leave) and got the ok to go ahead.

So, it's official!

I sobbed with relief for a good 15 minutes yesterday and have randomly burst into tears a few times since then but it's ALL GOOD. If I had to write a scenario for the perfect job situation for me...this would be it. It's actually a full-time position but they are letting me do it at 80% so I only have to work 6 hours a day, which is ideal for me and the kids. And it's PERMANENT. Yippeeee!!!!!

Seriously...the kids and I have been living pay cheque to pay cheque for the last 7 years and it's taken it's toll. The stress every year (and recently every 6 months) of not knowing if my contract was going to be renewed has been very difficult. Also, because I've only been working 15 hours a week (initially as the kids were still young, and more recently because I was studying) I've not got a cent in savings.

With an unreliable 13 year old car and the constant insecurity of having to rent a house, every day has felt like living on a knife edge. I still owe a friend money that he lent me last year when we moved, and I owe my mother money after she forked out on her credit card to get my car fixed when it broke down AGAIN in April. How fucking embarrassing, having to tell the mechanic that my pensioner mum was going to pay for my repairs on her credit card. I never want to be in that situation again.

First priority is to put a good chunk of money aside for car repairs and moving house..should the need arise. Then, should things go arse up, I only need to worry about the inconvenience of it all, it's no longer a catastrophic event for us.

This is like the start of a whole new life for me and the kids. I will be totally supporting myself now as my working hours have doubled to 30 hours a week which means I will no longer be eligible for any of the single parent's benefit from the government. It's totally up to me now, and I love that it is.

Relief....that's the only way to describe it just pure RELIEF.

And a big THANK YOU to whoever or whatever is out there, looking after me and the kids.

I promise...I'll pay you back tenfold.

.....45.....

So today I'm 45.

I thought this was going to be an awful birthday, one I'd want to forget. But just in the nick of time, hope has appeared. I won't know for sure until around 28th June, but I may have a permanent position as an Academic Support Officer at a School at the Uni where I am currently working.

Apparently the position had been advertised a couple of months ago and they didn't find anyone suitable. I just happened to send my resume to them last Monday, asking if they had any work, and they thought I might be suitable for the role.

I had a casual interview with the Dean of the School and his P/A and was asked to whip up a formal application letter so the other two members of the selection panel could have a look. Unfortunately they are both on leave until end of June so I won't know if the position is definitely mine until then.

But, 90% sure it's going ahead. Not going to be celebrating until it's confirmed but at least I'm sleeping again.

So...it's my birthday! Mum gave me a Myer/Kmart/Target gift voucher and so did the kids so I've going to be buying myself something nice. Might wait until I've lost 10kg though and have it as a reward to buy a new piece of clothing.

Leaving work early today to enjoy my free birthday movie ticket from Hoyts. I'm seeing The A-Team and eating ice-cream and Red Rock Deli Sea Salt and Balsamic Vinegar Chips (Oh-My-God).

So there.

And furthermore...

Venturing out of my cave - A catch-up post

So I'm back out of my cave (for good this time I hope).

Apologies for being a big sookie la la. It's been a really difficult time (and not even unemployed yet!) The work situation has been a stressful and protracted affair over the last year or so, and now that I know that I am definitely not working for my current employer after 30 June, I am finding I can actually focus a little better.

This is basically a catch up post as I've really neglected my blog lately. I've left things half finished as well as 'half-blogged', so I thought I would tie up a few loose ends (in case you were interested).

I also feel like an incredibly slack cow with regards to my online friends. You've been such a great support to me and lately I've not been reading/commenting or participating in general as I've been totally consumed with my work/financial situation. Sorry guys.

Not too much to tell really.

Well, I gave myself an ulcer and also ulcerated my esophagus from taking anti-inflammatories on an empty stomach..ONCE..what an idiot. I know they affect me and I usually only take the odd one with food but I was in a hurry to go to mum's for New Year's lunch and in lots of pain so downed two...with a cup of coffee.

I-D-I-O-T.

That's gonna take a while to heal.

Hmmm.....what else? Oh yeah..the whole unemployment thing - I've crapped on about that enough....

Argh....my FM and my back - Totally fucked but working on it. Have not had physio or chiro since January. 1 - because I am broke, and 2 - because they were doing bugger all good. There was just no point in going anymore, especially to the chiro. At one stage I was going 3 times a week and was still just as bad (and used ALL my savings). I have decided that I need to heal myself. No amount of chiro or physio is going to help if I am not doing the exercises I need to do to strengthen and stabilise my spine and other joints. I am in desperate need of treatment though but it is just a waste of money without the rehab to back it up. Once I start to feel definite improvement (and once I get a job), then I will go back.

Ahhh....Manflesh! ZILCH - not that I've been looking. I have spoken to Mr Man a couple of times on the phone recently and was considering meeting him for coffee but had a moment of clarity last week and realised that it would totally not work so will just concentrate on me-me-me for the time being.

The kids - they're fine...


that's about it!