What IS it with me?
Am I an adrenaline junkie? Do I have a desperate need to be seen...for attention?
Can't I just get my shit together and DO my stuff and not need any outside stimulation?
So, I did it again. This is about the sixth time in the last couple of years.
I think to myself that I would like a fella. I put my face and profile up on a dating site. I befriend a couple of chat buddies, tell guys that I'm interested so they buy 'stamps' and email me. I chat and email for two or three days and then.....I pull the plug. TOTALLY. No goodbye's...no explanations.
Seriously, if I ever really, really, genuinely want to meet someone, via the internet, I'm gonna need totally new photos and profile or no-one's gonna come near me for fear of me doing another runner.
I musn't be ready (after NINE years single). The thought of a relationship still makes me hyperventilate.
I need a "date-o-meter", posted on my blog. If I get all weird and it starts going into the 'red', people can whack me so I get back in my hole. (said date-o-meter now added).
Sounds like a plan......